Back in the day...

I’ve been listening to some Ken Kesey lately. Pretty interesting stuff. Ironically I just listened to Danger Angel on BurnCast, the similarity is um, interesting. Certainly I believe you can find these types of connections quite easily from generation to generation. What am I talking about? Well my perception is that each generational ‘group’ thinks the way they ‘did’ it was better, cooler, more organic. You hear it on Ragbrai all the time. People say, “well you know it used to be (more fun, less cops, crazier..)” Heck I’ve even said it. But I am beginning to think it is just DIFFERENT.  You can do Woodstock, Burning Man and Ragbrai year after year after year….it will never be ‘like the 1^st time’ ‘or the way it used to be’.  Why? Because it NOT that time. Things change……

Talk Derby to me....or just lie.

So I been busy, eh, well that is my excuse anyway. Sort of I have. Working two jobs really sucks up ALL of my time, then by the weekend it’s either run, run, run or do nothing at all.

The Kentucky Derby was a different kind of fun this year. Sarah and I drove down, it was a quick 9 hour drive and the second time we have driven to central Kentucky. We got within a few miles of her aunts house and stop for drinks. Then we promptly got lost trying to find the house!

Her sister Renae met us there. Love Renae but she could use a drink or twelve. Sarah’s aunt Mary was so sweet, she fed us, drove us back and forth and took us behind the scenes to the barns. Those horses are amazingly beautiful creatures! The people that work with them are some super dedicated individuals.

Then in the infield I was really glad to introduce Sarah and family to my friends and their best spot eva!  They didn’t think you would be able to see anything from the infield; well you just have to be in the right spot!

I can’t not mention the ‘drama’.  Since last year the ‘kitten’ was blowing up my phone about the Derby, I decided to return the favor. So for like two weeks

I texted (when we leaving, so excited, hat is ready…blah, blah) all to no response.

Finally I, text :um it’s just a trip, and you owe me(our old joke), nevermind.

That did it he replied:

-we’re not going,

- my bus was vandalized

- he thinks I’m not going to do anything fb

- just want to meet with sheriff and small claims

Um….what? So I, being nice now text:

-what is fb

-what happened

-sorry to hear about bus, but was told you were going

Then he replies:

-just stop it

Again, um, what? The man has totally lost it. So whatever…..that is until guess who is at the Derby….in the bus! Yeppers. When I walked up he immediately darts to the bus! What up liar?! Not only are you there but your vandalized bus looks fine to me. So…..pathetic, when I see him in the infield, he turned heel and went the other direction. Really?

On a good note got to see Steve and meet his friend (who was tanked on Mint Juleps). I like being around Steve he has calming effect on me, he is also not bad on the eyes….so yeah me!!

Well hellloooo

Honestly though I have been feeling really good, happy, content, you know o.k. Which says a whole lot. What a difference a year makes!

Been really excitedly preparing for Burning Man. Finished my bike, it is soooo cute! Got some awesome wears…fur coat (need to light it), fur vest, rope lighting, scarves, and a whole box load of do hickeys! I need to get some tubes for all this stuff, but I am holding out for some pink ones. Made a half ass attempt at making jewelry. It wasn’t bad, but it would be tons better if I didn’t rush the process, used more color, and oh yeah followed the instructions.

Camping with Pink Heart is going to be awesome! I signed up to work on the water bar and public area decorations. Will probably end up doing much more as I can’t much pre burn. But that’s good cause being active is good for me, and I can interact with more people. Think I may have secure a ride (hopefully) sharing gas and going with someone who knows what they are doing is always good.

In other news, agh the lose weight plan is well non existent at the moment. I think I have lost and gained the same 10 pounds all winter long. That is not motivating. Even though I looked really great for the wedding in my tight fitting super curvy dress, looking good with clothes on has never been the problem. Need to find more time to bike and get my lazy ass to the gym. Only a 109 days til BM and 70 days to Ragbrai, um and like 45 pounds to go. Crappers.

In the now K2's are ski's

This whole living in the now, being present idea, I get. It’s not a hard concept to wrap your mind around. Putting it into practice however is whole other ball game.

Lets just take the internet. I am online, like constantly. Need info Google it, share my great day-facebook, new recipes, new books, new people…….yeah I’m still looking for the end of the net. Where was I going with this? Oh, yeah see it is so super easy for me to drift from the now moment. Even with it right here in front of me; I quickly can jump to somewhere else. A future event….look it up on the internet, a past event…the internet holds onto the memories I forget. Now the internet is not bad, well not mostly, but I need to learn to limit my time there.

The TV too. My guilty pleasures, reality television. Ok everyone needs an escape. But the news, ah, that is so frustrating. For instance last night before bed no less, they did a story about K2. A smokable form of potpourri, um the key word there is potpourri! Kid smoked this stuff and hmm…died, killed himself, whatever, parents blame K2! Hold the incense! Why, why, why is your kid smoking potpourri!??

Now the parents want it banned….you know for the safety of the kids. WTF. People you can legislate stupidity. My potpourri satchel is for refreshing my drawers not smoking. So frustrating. Now wonder our government is  so messed up….they waste valuable time dealing with crap like this.  

Now excuse me while returned to the now moment. Where things are good and stupid do not reign.

Kiddos

Kiddos, I don’t have any, don’t want any….yea I’m good. I’m just really aware that I am in now way prepared for that type of emotional responsibility. That and the fact that there is nothing in the whole world that makes me wanna.

Parents are always doing the count (that what I call it). Countdown until they have the baby, til the kids walking/talking, til school, graduation… Because after the kids get to ‘here’ then I can…I desire not to spend my life in countdown mode.

All this stirred up in my head yesterday. This girl I work with is married and they have a 3 year old, plus she 4 months pregnant. She is kinda you but doesn’t seem to know a whole lot about anything. (unless she’s hiding it) Like she never know where places are in town, about concerts or restaurants. Every time she says she hasn’t heard of something I’m like really.

Dear Universe, never let me become so consumed with a husband and/or kids, that I forget to live my own life. Thanks bunches.

Hearing Check

Why is it that guys always try to identify with my dad? Guys who never knew him. (and oh, could never measure up to him). I mean really. Statement from a guy this weekend: “I’m more like your dad than you are.” Um, what. I am totally hoping that because I was sipping on the sweet nectar that I heard that wrong. Rotate.

Getting Aligned

Three things today- meditation, chakras and crystals!

I’ve been learning to meditate. I like it. It takes a lot more concentration than I really thought it would. Lately I have been doing guided meditation. Trying to do it on my own in a quiet room, is well, my mind wonders like a stray dog. After working out I get home, stretch then meditate, it has a nice calming effect.

There was online test for your chakra openness. I only have two that are open! I have some work to do.  Of the seven chakras my Heart and Third Eye (Brow) are the most energized.

In an effort to balance my chakras off I went to the Ancient Ways store over by Carls Place. They have some interesting things in there. Saw some really cute boots (but they did not fit) and a cool cape (but 200 bucks, yea, no). Anyway they have crystals! I wasn’t sure what I needed at the time, so I got a cool black tourmaline crystal with a butterfly etched in it. It’s for strength and transformation, ok!

All in all I will be going back to the Ancient Ways Store! I’m excited to learn more about the crystals, chakras and meditation! I’ve become fascinated by this whole concept.